Where have I been?
I like cheese!
And then I thought "And don't I wrote stuff on that blog thing on the intar-webs?" And yeah, I remembered. But where have I been? Was I kidnapped by Claymates? Forced to watch Dr Phil and de-homofy myself? No, it was even worse than that.
My man-bag was stolen. The thieving bitch got my new cell phone, my iPod, my wallet (id and credit cards, bitches), and my check book. They also stole a bunch of cash (this happened at a place of bizness) and someone else's gas card. I found out that they used my checkbook and ID to purchase almost 250 bucks worth of liquor nearby, so between that and the cash I figure that someone had a party and I'm pissed off that they didn't invite the fuckin' hosts. Some people got no manners.
OH NO MY EYES!
BLOGGER ISN'T LET ME UPLOAD IMAGES FOR NOW, DANG IT! I had this awesomely scary picture of DF on the red carpet looking totally coked outta her head, she probably just snorts pop rocks though. Kids these days..."I've found your weakness and I will now eat your soul" says Hollywood's hottest young actress.
I read yesterday that little Dakota Fanning (aka "quit yelling, you're making my ears bleed you little snotbag!") is filming some movie that details some rather intense physical and sexual abuse. It's gotten so bad that the film's backers have pulled out. Can I just say that I'm officially a-scared of her? F'real, she's like the anti-Lil' Kims. I hereby move to place that evil Trollkin at the top of the Vitriol's Most Wanted list. Let's bring her in before she bears the child of Xenu and rains destruction down on us from her >redacted by author who refuses to think of a euphemism for her bagina cuz yeah, I do have some kind of ethics or morals or some shit<. In other news
Not a whole lot is going on. I'm really disappointed that my shero Lil' Kims is keeping such a low profile. I guess jail really got to her; maybe I should bake her a cake? Knit her a hat or something? Let's all get together and warm her heart with a cool island song! Or wait, maybe we should just all cut the left boobs out of our shirts and stick Lisa Frank Stickers over our nipples as a show of solidarity with her. We will wear our homemade LK fashions to let her know that we're thinking of her and can't wait for her to jump start the revolution.Yeah, still no pics allowed. I can't believe I blew my wad with "I like cheese" . Fuck. Oh well, if you want scary pics, scroll down two entries...
© 2006 CH